Pearl Harbor--Last Thoughts

There are events in every generation that define them. People in my generation have grown up with Pearl Harbor as much a part of our history as the Great Depression was for our parents and grandparents, and 9/11 will be for my children and grandchildren. While we didn't live through it, it was so closely tied into our past, it was as if we did.

Visiting Pearl Harbor has been on my Bucket List for a long time. It did not disappoint. Through viewing the displays, the political climate around the world became clearer, describing the Japanese expansionist program, and the reason for the Isolationist attitude of the United States. Between the photographs, visiting the Arizona, and watching the videos, two impressions stand-out.

1) The most poignant moments were hearing the voices of those who were there and survived. Nurses at the hospital, children, soldiers, regular citizens; people who watched the planes flying low overhead, and heard the bombs drop.

One of the most startling images was this photo of children in gas masks. It is a haunting image and I was really taken aback.

The quote that accompanied the photo: "Life after the attack--We carried gas masks in our arms and wore hibiscus in our hair."

As I looked at the photo, my first thought was 'How awful!' But it was a war-time reality. It made me think about all the times that children have had to cope with extreme dangers. I hate the fact that my grandchildren live in a time when they need to be taught how to react in an Active Shooter situation. This photo reminds me that children, all through time, have had to cope with terrible situations. Children in England were sent by their families in London to live with strangers in the country, so they'd be safe from WWII bombs. Hitler's Youth were used to search the ghetto basements for abandoned babies when Jews were moved out. These are just a couple of examples of real life.

As adults we've always taught children to beware. Centuries ago, parents used stories like Little Red Riding Hood to teach Stranger Danger. Teaching children how to protect themselves may be scary for them, but it also empowers them. It is through the love and guidance of nurturing adults that most children survive terrible events and grow up relatively unscathed, even as they carry nightmares of bombs falling.

2) Pearl Harbor is a wonderful memorial, but it is when you visit the Arizona, that the impact hits home. Standing in the memorial, looking at the ship below, seeing fuel slowly bubble up to the surface, looking at the names on the wall; it is sobering.

I have had the privilege of visiting a few Sacred Sites in my life. The first one was in Germany when we visited Dachau, the concentration camp. The second one was the empty pit of the Twin Towers in New York. Pearl Harbor was the third. At each site, people walked in expectantly, curious about what they would find. At each site, people left in silence, overwhelmed by the inherent understanding of the loss of life, the sadness of war, the ultimate sacrifice, regardless of whether the victims had signed up for duty or simply been a victim of an ideology.

There was something else that I saw. Beautiful displays of Origami Paper Cranes.

The Japanese legend of 1000 paper cranes promises that whoever folds 1000 paper cranes will have their wish.

Sadako Sasaki with her parents, before she became ill.

Sadako Sasaki was a young girl who developed leukemia following the atomic bomb at Hiroshima. Sadako pledged to make 1,000 origami cranes before she died. Her wish? To live. She didn't. But her family carried her memory forward. Today the crane lives on as a symbol of world peace, and appears at sites where terrorism has taken lives. They are a sign of hope in the midst of tragedy.

From Dachau to Pearl Harbor, The canes remind us that war is sad, futile, evil, and should be vigorously avoided. But when it's inevitable, we have an honor and a duty to stand for those who can't stand for themselves. Pearl Harbor left me contemplating so much about America's place in the world, about the sadness, the futility of war, and about the dignity of life.

Most of all, it reminded me that, while we must never forget our history--both the good and the bad parts--we use the past to learn the lessons for the future, to remember the heroes, the survivors, and how we were able to grow beyond our tears.

The Tree of Life created for Pearl Harbor

MEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! A Two-Year Old's Vocabulary

I'm staying with Jen and Dave these days to help take care of Zachary while his current babysitter is unavailable. I love these days with the kids. I haven't been here for close to a year, although I've seen them a couple of times in that period. This gives me a chance to reconnect with Nicholas and get to know Zachary a little better. He is two. He is self-absorbed. He is determined. He rules the world. As far as he is concerned, It's All About ME!!!

Zachary's idea of getting to know you is to give you a big hug-- a wonderful hug, I might add-- and to make sure you know EXACTLY what he wants and what he doesn't want. That's a tall order for an itty bitty thing that has a working vocabulary of about 5 words.

Mama, DADA, Out, UH-UH!, The lesser--Uh Huh!, EW and ME! or MEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!! depending on the urgency. There are other words, but these are the most important as far as he is concerned.

And yet we always know just what it is he wants.

Most of those are self explanatory. EW is very descriptive and covers everything from sticky hands, to a stinky diaper. EW with a screech probably means "Get that drop of syrup off of my bib this second!" EW means "Clean it Up!"

Then there are hand signals. An outstretched hand opening and closing means "I want to show you something". Wise people will go look. It could be harmless... "I want Elmo out of my bed." Or it could mean "Look! There's a boat floating in the toilet!", OR, "I just helped myself to some vita gummies on the counter." He is a constant reminder that 2 year-olds are fun-loving (note: boat) and resourceful (note: vita gummies).

My favorite hand signal is the one that comes at the end of dinner... or after he eats 3 bites and hands his plate back. "Dada!," he says. When Dave looks at him he holds his arms out in front of him, makes a tight fist with his hands, and his whole upper body tenses and shakes---his sign for Cold--or in this case, ICE CREAM! His light blue eyes positively light up at the thought! If dada ignores him he tries it again, a little louder. By the 3rd time his eyes have a fierce look, the shaking has taken on earthquake proportions, and he sends as much energy as he can muster into that look so there can be no mistaking what he wants!

Today we have heard a lot of  UH-UH, and MEEEEEEE!!! Today he is ornery and full of himself. Whatever I suggest, (or need to do) he's got other plans.

"Zachary, it's time for lunch." "Uh-Uh"

I try again, "Yep, It's time for lunch!," I say enthusiastically. "UH-UH!" he answers with more defiance.

"Do you want a hot dog, or Peanut butter?" UH-UH!

I change tactics.
"Then it's time for a nap." UH-UH!!

Lunch or Nap?  UH-UH!!!  Each response is louder and higher in pitch.

Finally we settle on lunch.

"Let's get in your chair." MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!! he says racing to the chair.
I slowly back away, lest it escalates again, and let him climb in his chair by himself.
I heat his hot dog in the microwave and transfer it to his plastic plate.

UH-UH!!!!! he says pushing away his plate.
This, I have learned, doesn't mean he doesn't want it. It means if I fixed it on one plate, that's the plate HE expects to be served on. I put the hot dog back on the paper plate and give that to him.

I am learning. There are tricks to feeding him. There are ways to cajole him into doing what you want. And there are times when you will never win, until you pull out the Parent Card:  "When all else fails, remember YOU ARE BIGGER!" As parents, next to patience, it is the best card we have.

An Articulated Quad-Track

I am now in phase 2 of a marathon fall pilgrimage. Usually I visit my two daughters and their families at different times, but this year the visits are literally back to back. Maggie and I made the long trek from Florida to Iowa, with a short visit in Atlanta seeing my sister and her husband.

The drive up was lovely and I had 2 days of fall with leaves in their prime and the sun beaming from a blue sky. The temperatures were very mild and the whole trip was delightful. By the time I reached Iowa the trees were bare, so 'pretty fall' is past and late fall is here.

Now I'm getting to catch up with my other 5 year-old grandson and 2 year-old granddaughter. 2 year-olds change so quickly that it is like finding a new child every time I see her. Samantha's chatter is almost undecipherable, but after awhile it is like learning a new language. Even without realizing it you recognize that 'babry duppi' is 'Granberry, thank you', and 'bobe ow' is 'puppy down' ( on the floor) and most importantly that 'I'm full' means 'I'm done' even if it means she is tired of doing puzzles or reading stories.

Warren doesn't change as drastically anymore. He and Nicholas are very different in temperment and interests, but one thing is the same. Nicholas is obsessed with Nascar, but he is learning that housekeeping in Pre-K is fun. Warren is just as obsessed with tractors but puzzles, and drawing pictures are finding their way into his life.

A big change for Warren is the addition of other brands. My John Deere only grandson has added Case/International Harvester (called CaseIH), and New Holland brands to the list of tractors he identifies with equal enthusiasm.

His knowledge and understanding of life on the farm astounds me. He listens with rapt attention to the conversation of the adults and asks them intelligent questions about all sorts of things. The other night we were out and heading home after dark. Spying a pair of large headlights in a field Warren suddenly piped up. "Is that the articulated quad track, Dad?" HUH? I've been around long enough to have learned what a quad-track was, but articulated? New one for me. I kept silent, but the next morning I had to ask Mike what articulated meant. (It bends in the middle. AH!)

CaseIH Articulated Quad-Track Tractor

"Yes", Dad responded.
"Oh, the CaseIH." Warren said, knowingly. (He spits out the words so rapidly it sounds like KCH.)

"What's over there?" Mike asked pointing to another set of headlights.
"Is it Tom?" (Warren's uncle)
"Yup"
"Oh"

Notice we are looking at headlights and it is dark! ( I will admit, the field Mike was pointing to, was by Tom's house, so that wasn't as ridiculous as it seemed.)

Now I've learned to recognize Sprayers and Planters, Diskers and Combines, Quad-Tracks, Skid-Loaders, Tractors, and Wagons. I can keep up with the CaseIH, John Deere and the New Hollands, but if I have to pick out a CaseIH Articulated Quad-Track by it's headlights, I might as well confess right now.

The Jig is up. I'll never know as much as my 5 year-old grandson.

Baby Watching

I'm having fun. I am baby watching. On the weekends, I get to play with Nicholas, but during the week he is in school all afternoon. We didn't really want to disrupt his schedule that much, so he stays at his other grandma's house in the morning and she gets him to school. I stay home with Zachary.

What I've learned in the week I've been here.
1. Zach is strong. He's been crawling for 2 months. Now, at 7 1/2 months he is standing and letting go. He loves to do this. He will go from sitting or squatting to standing and repeat it several times.
2. Zach is fearless. Big dogs and vacuum cleaners are things to follow after and grab ahold of.

3. Maggie loves babies. I didn't really realize that before. I knew she was good with them, but she seems very happy to be here and she rarely moves away from the baby.
4. Zachary is a chatter-box but he speaks mostly cave-man: "uh, uh, uh, HUH, AHH, uh, uh"
5. Zachary ADORES his big brother.
 There's a story that goes along with that.

When Nicholas comes home in the afternoon, Zachary lights up. Nicholas plays pretty well with him most of the time. When they play together, Zach's normally happy face becomes a huge grin, and the laughs and shrieks follow.

Sometimes Nicholas likes to play with his race cars and at those times, he doesn't want Zachary around. The other night I was feeding Zachary while Nicholas was racing. Nicholas is full of sound affects. His car sounds can be quite real. EEEYYOWW echoed into the kitchen as the cars went around the track.

Zachary couldn't see him from his chair. I kept trying to spoon cereal into his little mouth, but I was having trouble. There was 'The Moving Target' to deal with as Zach kept rocking back and forth in his chair. He was also busy making his caveman sounds.  mmMMMmmm, mmMMMmm, mmMMMmm... As I watched, I caught on. He was imitating Nicholas with his race car sounds.

I moved the high chair to the doorway where he could see his brother. The rocking slowed. As I moved a spoon into view, the mouth popped open. It worked for a few minutes at least. Then a big grin covered his face and he gave a happy shriek....splattering cereal all over. Which brings me to...

6. The other thing I've learned...feeding babies is still a messy business.