Writer's Block: When your imaginary friends won't talk to you.
"You can't think yourself out of a writing block. You must write yourself out of a thinking block." John Rogers
I love that first line, but it's the second one that holds truth. It's been months since I've written. Not just here. I haven't written anything since October. Our usual Christmas letter became a Photo Card. I enjoy doing a Christmas letter and try to put a personal twist into it. In the past I've described the signs of the season in Florida (foggy mornings and strawberry fields being prepared for planting). I've re-written the lyrics of a Christmas song. One year I made our kids write their own paragraph and sign it. This year, I had no imagination, and reeling off a recap of the year just didn't work for me.
I've looked inside to see what was the matter, but I really don't know. In my experience, people start to withdraw from communication when they are dealing with stress. It may be emotional stress, such as the loss of a loved one, or the end of a relationship. Sometimes the actual work of living our daily lives become so time consuming there is no time to reach out to friends. We just go through the day, putting one foot in front of the other, doing whatever has to be done next. Illness also has a way of separating us from people.
I've looked at all of that, and nothing rings true. I could feel myself detaching last fall when we were traveling. I enjoyed each day as it happened and felt little need to share it with the rest of the world. True confession leads me to admit we were dealing with some health issues that definitely impacted my need to Blog, but I'm still not sure that was it.
At first I wondered if anyone would notice. People were pretty quiet. but recently, a few have started asking when I was going to start writing again. In talking it over with a fellow writer she gave me some encouragement. "Taking a break is often a good thing," she said. "You'll know when you're ready."
The other day I checked my blog and noticed a couple of drafts that were never completed. I felt a new spark. The winter is over and spring is beginning. I think it's time to pick up the pen, or in this case, tap away on the keyboard and start sharing new thoughts.
I hope, dear reader, that you're ready!
Food for thought: Have you ever experienced a season of life where you pulled away from people in an uncharacteristic way? What was it? ..... if you don't mind sharing, post it in a reply.
First of all -- I DID notice that you were among the missing! Just a few days ago I was musing that maybe I'd ask if you'd stopped writing here, but then decided against it.
ReplyDeleteMy opinion when it comes to blogging: Sometimes one writes about life. Sometimes one lives life, and sometimes both can be done together. I think there's this natural ebb and flow of life, where you go from one state to another.
I think - for me I'm not able to write well when I am in the midst of something in serious need of processing. It could be a health concern, an unresolved situation, or simply ongoing fears, worries, confusion, or vulnerability that causes so much overwhelm that I'm unable to explain it in words. How do you explain something you can't explain - or - maybe, sometimes, you don't want to explain? Those things even block me from writing about other things - or make those other things seem trivial.
I guess you could say that I have given up my public wordpress blog, although I still hope - at times - that I will resurrect it. It's still up with the last entry being in 2012. My problem with writing there was that it WAS public to anyone who might randomly find it. That fact always short circuited my ability formulate an entry. I give you a lot of credit for being able to maneuver the public vs. private when writing.
I continue to write on Live Journal (and have since 2001), but it's more of a journal than a blog, and it's locked only to readers who have subscribed to my journal -- i.e. -- those that I have "friended". I'm able to write more freely in that atmosphere, because I know that I don't have to worry - at least as much - about public / private issues.
I was able to write about our house damage and rebuild, and that is an example of the overwhelm that blocked my writing. Right after it happened, I'd vowed to keep a journal of what happened, and the rebuild progress, but there were times when I found it too difficult to write. I didn't want to rehash all the upset, not to mention it was too confusing all that was going on. Weeks later, I'd finally reconstruct the events and try to remember feelings I felt of what had happened. In a way there is nothing wrong with that. Sometimes dark sides are best left unseen!
Oh -- and one other thing has stifled my writing. I have had entries I'm really happy with how I expressed myself. Then when it comes time to write another entry, I compare writing to THAT entry, and anything I type out seems inferior, and that, in itself is a block.
That's all I can think of ... for now....
Wendy, you have really good thoughts on this. I especially like your point on needing time to process when you're in the middle of a situation. Privacy is part of that. But Understanding what is going on, and internalizing it before expressing it is really important.
ReplyDeleteMost of all, I agree: when it comes to blogging, sometimes we write about life. sometimes we live life. Thanks for your comments. Keep living life!